Texturized insects as protein and exploitation

I am the proverbial fly on the conference room wall. The topic is climate change: how do we profit from catastrophe. Profit profit über alles, über alles in der Welt.

fly-on-the-wall

Agenda items:

The herbivorous are threats most dangerous in the land of the carnivorous.

A promising opportunity to profitably exploit the human craving system: Feed insects to meat eaters in near future by playing the climate card.

Keep every pipeline fully flowing to fill all shelves. But appear forward-thinking and exciting. Technology sells well. Widen fossil-fuel pipeline paths to permit parallel pipelines for moving bugs to processing nodes. Pump to population centers and employ existing logistical systems.

A fresh idea: suck insects off the swamps that climate change creates. Convert submerged buildings into nesting cells for all manner of swamp-thriving bugs. Purchase real estate at the cheap and use existing food service logistical paths.

profiting-from-climate-change

Sweet secret: we’re going to continue producing meat to satisfy the demand that we expect to continue. A bigger stake in steak if you will. The new insect consuming customers can have their meat and the maggots too. We need risk no jobs/votes from meat cravers.

Never forget politically important States such as Iowa. Meet the meat voter where they eat. Steak, eggs, milk. Meat is forever.

Let me pass this thought for a grub stake. Suggest through advertising that vegans failed to deliver at the marketplace. Vegan diets are passé anyway, tofu = joke, veggie burger = another joke. Vegans will remain the brunt of ridicule, ‘nough said?

It is so wonderful that the fake-news industry grows just as corporations need fake news most.

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Here’s a bold challenge: devote marketing budgets into fake agencies like the Koch brothers funded in the 2016 political arena. The core idea: guise disinformation and cloak actual information. So, vegans are sickly and poorly informed about the role of meat, egg and dairy for healthy families.

Don’t forget that big lies yield big paychecks and bigger lies yield bigger paychecks. Simple economics.

Fortunately for the fine and decent folk neck deep in fossil-fuel sectors: we will shortly enjoy an administration in D.C. that recognizes the eternal vigor of pyramid schemes — envision the eye atop the pyramid as the eye of Trump. Our president arrives in two months, confidence man incarnate. Con artists never lie.

Now, who is responsible for developing an inauguration ploy: something like reports of 444 day hostages crossing free airspace as Reagan spoke in 1981. A symbolic action portrays a phoenix-bird Trump arising from a failed Obama administration.

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War has always been peace.

Freedom has always been slavery.

Ignorance has always been strength.

And so, seekers of wealth at any cost: the only thing you have to fear is truth.

Veganism 102: Think Outside the Asylum

According to a highly anonymous source the holiday season begins with monster-sized sales of Halloween junk food or junk ephemera. It peaks on Super Bowl Sunday to celebrate the nation’s Gross Decadent Product — it’s gross, it’s decadent, it’s a product.

Marketing term of the day: Bold Challenge: the perfect balance between perfidy and truth. Get away with whatever you can, whenever you can, whatever the stretch. Gain advantage. Think bottom line. Think Glengarry Glen Ross.

 

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Meat is Violence

Well Bill, let me explain the game of American football. The NFL is life. In college I learned that football programs fund universities. Sports medicine is the sugar that keeps the doctor away. Concussions: a money-making bold challenge for research grant seekers. Research dollars flow to research grant holders. Jobs is jobs is jobs. Now that is a bold challenge. It’s where the smart money gravitates. Live with it.

What to do with all that depleted uranium? Proclaim it a natural resource. Naturally it’s a resource, one discovered by Americans for Americans in America. Does that star-spangled banner still wave?

What’s next? Well, in daydreams I fancy myself a broadcaster working for the sports at Fox.

What inspired that Bill?

Well, I read that math and science is superfluous for science reporters at Fox News (the balanced and the fair). One Fox science reporter majored in wrestling.

And so, my awe-inspiring paucity of sports knowledge qualifies me eminently. Bill Ziegler, sports expert for Fox Sports (or whatever it’s called).

Do I digress, or what?

Veganism is not even recognized in the WordPress dictionary of spellings. It’s simply not in the database. What gives?  That’s my question. Veganism reduces madness on befouled planets. Not a bad idea. Really. Think outside the asylum.

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Vote Big Coal Kentucky! Revive depleted uranium for military vehicles racing through the Middle East. Weapons proudly labelled “Made in the USA” and protected by the Second Amendment.

Mad in the USA.

 

Speaking of the sports metaphor, are they hiring at the white phosphorous plant up in Chemical Valley? The Charleston River flows into the Ohio River. They call it the chemical capital of the world. It’s in West Virginia, where the jobs aren’t. American jobs not already stolen by Indians in India or Indian-giving (tongue-in-cheek) Indians in North America.

Union Carbide once operated a plant in Bhopal India…

Look Bill. Get real and get with the program. ’nuff said?

Hey Bill, aluminum cans are flimsy, not like the steel ones we made right here in these States of the United. But do you know what’s not flimsy: beer cans tempered with depleted uranium. We have a lot of this raw material. It’s a resource, naturally enough.

 

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The Graduate-level advice in two words: depleted uranium.

Thanks for reading.

Discomfort Foods

A sentient being is a bag of chemicals, skin is its largest organ. Sentient beings walk, fly and swim around in a bag holding every other organ.

Each is a biochemical factory that absorbs nutrients and toxins, then discharges them as excreted waste products.

What happens when you consume something?

everytime

As vegan I affirm the right of fellow planetary inhabitants to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Veganism does not exclude other sentient beings from that life, liberty and pursuit.

Today’s theme: discomfort foods.

A discomfort food is as fulsome as the original definition of fulsome. Sentient-beings’ skin and the organs they contain are craved and craven. Douglas Adams suggested the disquieting breach of accepted protocol that comes upon meeting meat

Douglas Adams’ cow that wants to be eaten

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So when does craving become craven?

After a few years of pursuing veganism your body cleanses at the molecular level. Eventually each toxin-laden cell is replaced. Initially you feel sluggish because your body is going through detox. SOS is status quo cell replacement. Removing all flesh-based substances also replaces the craving for more and more.

A vegetarian diet that includes byproducts in the form of cheese and other dairy stuffs prevents that crave from leaving the organ bag. Those free-sample cubes of cheese in the supermarket spark an impulse to eat more.

Yes, it takes time to replace trillions of cells, but the cycle is broken. Once I conducted an experiment in the supermarket fish aisle. I ate a shrimp placed on the free samples table. Five minutes later my tongue yielded foam as toxic discharge.

It was uncomfortable. I felt like a cannibal.