Veganism, Meatism and Freneticism

It’s a good day to weigh value systems and lifestyles.

Sounds judgmental, Bill. A waste of time and a waste of electrons. You know very well that we’re too busy and far too important to read your screed, yet you insist on inviting us to your frugal table. Why do that?

I don’t know.

ConsumeristVeganism

Freneticism. An active lifestyle, branded on gross national consumption — consumers playing a complacent role toward a dismal goal.

Michael Ende’s classic novel Momo explains it well. Ende knows his Zeitdieben (time thieves) — those functionaries  who siphon the productivity of persons more innocent, more gentle. Quite a fine book, if you have the time.

Do con artists ever have a hidden agenda? Just an idle question.

momo.zeitdiebe
from: Vegan Warrior Princesses Attack

May we remind you, Bill, there is more money in beef than in beets. Jobs from sea to befouled sea, that’s what we’re talking about. Filling waste-management positions, artery pharmaceutical rep salaries, butcheries and slaughterers, belly futurists, hide sellers, Boeuf Taco artisans.

Meatism: a lifestyle based on flesh and blood, unfertilized eggs, calf milk, buttered bacon, Snausages®  all nicely appointed on a dinner plate. Marketers know their play-books, how to drone a message into your psyche, how to grant you the illusion of independent thought —  you are the one doing the thinking. Something to manufacture a lasting crave, powerful enough to drive you from refrigerator and pantry to the supermarket and back. Where are the car keys? The 12-hour Energy Boosters®?

Consume, c o n s u m e, C O N S U M E, c o n s u m e, consume. 

The lab gals and guys have skills honed to fashion biochemical ions that stimulate taste receptors and simulate well-being. Palm oil fuels a munch crave. Be they chips or be they crisps — an open bag is an empty bag. Palm oil substitutes for hydrogenated oil, but threatens rainforests.

You’re a do-gooder and a poison-ivy hugger, Bill. Let us buy you an ivy salad. Our treat.

Buy another bag. And aren’t you clever now  — buy a bigger bag or two, or five. Buy ten bags and save ten dollars. The more you buy, the more you save.

Wow. Where are the car keys? The 12-hour Energy®?

A dinner plate is a wasteland, absent a meat entree to grace it, my friend. We did not evolve to nibble bunny salads and sip miso soup. Let us tell you about tired emaciated vegans. God made animals for us to domesticate and to eat. F-ing cows were not created in God’s image. We are not Bottom-headed — and we’re not bottom feeders. 

Of course.

Thanks for reading.

 

 

 

Veganism and the Sacred Cow

Meatism is a lifestyle choice very deeply rooted in a modern society based on Freneticism. Big lies fuel bigger enterprises. Veganism threatens the BIG LIE with mere truth, but that hardly stops Meatists does it?

Chicken wearing funny vegan sign.

Are you now, or have you ever been a member of the Veganist Party? 

The land of the fruited plain and the home of the Atlanta Braves® knows what’s for dinner — boeuf. This place is always open for business. American students may not be able to locate India on a world map, but they know how to form a turkey by circumscribing the human hand.  Put it on the refrigerator and talk about the two (2) turkeys who will be pardoned this November.

vicious.vegan

Believe a whopper. Eat a Whopper®.

The Pilgrims arrived at Plymouth Rock to escape persecution (and to spread their own form of persecution). They invited savages (Native Americans) to dinner, the savages brought something hitherto unknown to Europeans — wild turkey. But the savages with red skin (just like the football team) turned on those settlers. Ungrateful beasts, behaving like animals.

Pop quiz: what is an Indian giver?

On September 1, 1914 the last Passenger Pigeon died in captivity. Unfortunately the pigeons were tasty fowl that dropped to the ground when you shot at the sky. Dress them for dinner.

Needlepoint project: “A Passenger Pigeon in every pot.” Good luck students!

The American Bison numbered thunderous thousands. Print the photograph of a mound of bison skulls for your refrigerator door.

bison.skulls.1870s
From Smithsonian.org. This is not a photoshopped image. Would that it were.

American ingenuity solved the extinction problem by creating the factory farm.

If those silly Hindus would eat the sacred cows walking and defecating in the marketplace, no one would starve in India.

Philip Morris® purchased Kraft Foods® in 1985. Both industries are in the addiction business, so it was a good marriage. Cigarette companies know much about carving out markets and expanding them. Japanese women don’t smoke? Make them customers. Chinese women don’t smoke? Make them customers.

Nestlé®owns Hot Pockets® Eat them for breakfast, lunch, dinner and middle-of-the-night craves.

hot_pocket

Kraft® owns Lunchables® Throw Lunchables® into your shopping cart after a frenetic day at the office. Throw them in by the fistful. You ate the Lunchables® that the kids wouldn’t eat while you were working. You didn’t break for lunch, but the lunch will probably break you.

What about the customers who become too grown up for your product? Carve a new niche that keeps ’em buying. Choosy Jif® mothers read magazine ads.

The more you waste, the greater the gross national product — by definition.

Thanks for reading.